Life, family, business

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Everything You Tell Yourself is TRUE!

Everything you tell yourself is true.

You are what you say and think you are.

~be careful little mouth what you say~

You have to believe in yourself.  If you’ve ever been in sports, your coach probably said those words, or told you that you have to believe it to achieve it, or something similar. Many times in life when we face obstacles, we talk ourselves through it, we help ourselves do something by believing we can!  But if the talk in our minds is negative, its not going to help us at all.  Its going to pull us down, because if you believe you are worthless, you’ll become worthless.  If you believe you are overcoming, then you are an over-comer.  As children, we are told many things, some good, some bad.  Stop believing the bad things.  Stop believing the cruel words of others.  Only believe the good, and work toward being better. Try hard to be a better person today, than you were yesterday.  Change only happens when you change what you are saying to yourself!

~be careful little ears what you hear~

But think about this, what if every song lyric you sang or listened to automatically transferred into your life as a true fact.  Would you keep listening to the same music?  The songs you sing in your head; are they going to lift you up? Or bring you down?  Do you listen to sad songs? Or songs about violence and rage?  Those words are who you become.  Do the lyrics of your favorite song talk about how pathetic you are?  How screwed up you are?  Its only going to reinforce these thoughts and keep you stuck in the downward spiral.

It kills me when people who suffer from depression listen to death metal.  Don’t you want to feel better? Listen to happy music, children’s songs, church hymns, anything that’s upbeat.  Don’t reinforce your depression by listening to someone drone on about how miserable they are, or how terrible their life is.  Every genre has this music; Country, Rap, Metal, and Rock.  There are even Classical pieces that resonate doom and despair-don’t listen to them! Pick something that makes you feel good inside.  Find some music that makes you feel happy.  And no, don’t try to tell me you only feel happy when you listen to depressing or angry music, I don’t buy it, please don’t insult my intelligence.  Find some relaxing music; Native American flutes, Buddhist singing bowls, or ocean waves, or something from nature; anything that clears your mind and helps you think in a positive manner.

~be careful little eyes what you see~

Did you know that when you watch a movie, your subconscious brain believes its really happening to you?  There are people who have been diagnosed with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder after watching violence happenings on television.  Some people are more sensitive than others and watching horror movies, or violence, can cause serious repercussions, especially in children. So think about how much stress you are inflicting on your subconscious just by what you watch on the screen! (I’m going to start watching exercise videos!)

~be careful little hands what you do~

Having nothing to do is an invitation to boredom, and that can cause you to feel worthless.  Find a hobby.  Find something for you to do in your spare time.  You’d be better off finding a part time job to make a few extra bucks than just sitting around moping.  It good to have things to do, find some!

Finding peace is possible, if you want to find it.  You have to believe you can, and you need to feel that you are worthy.  Only you can make your life better, and the best way to start is by realizing that everything you tell yourself is true.  The words you say, the music you listen to, the things you give your attention to, are the things that make up your life.  If you want your life to change, you have to change it!  You have to pick a different choice than you have in the past.

“Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right.”

“If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got.”

“There is no man living who isn’t capable of doing more than he thinks he can do.”

Henry Ford is credited for the quotes above, and he’s right.





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What’s Your Opinion?

I can be a very opinionated person.  I have a very strong belief system and I defend my beliefs.   An opinion is simply a belief or view or judgment formed about something.  We all have them.  Some have more than others.

Every person is entitled to their own opinion about anything.  Here in the United States we have the freedom of speech, and we have the right to voice our opinions.  However, its important to remember that not everyone has the same opinion, and even though you can voice your opinion, I don’t have to listen.

What makes some people feel the need to express their opinion to people they barely know, with no invitation?  What makes these people think that their opinion means anything to people they don’t know?

This is one of the things I’ve been pondering over this Christmas holiday.  It seems like I meet one of these people every year or two.  But what makes a person act like this? I’m not talking about your outspoken friend talking to you, I’m talking about that person who has just met you, or is in your line at the store, or the person behind you in line at the buffet who makes unkind or rude comments about your choice of food.

The one theme I see in people like this is ignorance.  People who don’t take the time to learn about a situation and just try to judge others are very ignorant.  People who try to tell you what they think or believe without being invited into the conversation are rude, discourteous, and lacking manners.

I know I have acted this way as well, especially when I was younger.  Its something I try very hard not to do.  These rules are obviously not for close friends, they are my rules for meeting new people and talking to people you don’t know well:

NEVER insert your opinion where its not wanted. How do you know if it’s wanted?  The person will ask you for it if they want it. If they don’t ask, keep your yap shut.

NEVER criticize other adults for their choices.  Its not your life, you don’t get to choose for anyone except yourself.  If you don’t like the way someone else did it, then don’t do it that way yourself, and keep your yap shut.

And lastly, you can judge people all you want in your head, but keep your yap shut.  Karma is a bitch. You reap what you sow.  Once you start judging others out loud, you will become the target of those who will judge you as harshly as you judge others.

I can tell you from experience that when you try to insert your opinion into someone else’s life, they generally aren’t going to like it, especially if it doesn’t agree with theirs.  When people do any of these things to me, or breaks my rules, it creates an instant dislike of that person.  Is this me judging?  Yes, it is.  As an adult, I get to decide who my friends are, and who I talk to.  There are so many negative people in this world, I try my hardest to make sure I don’t add any of them into my  circle of friends, or even my list of acquaintances.

Since I have started choosing the people I allow into my life more carefully, I have become a much happier person.  I surround myself with people who are also tolerant, loving, and peaceful.  I reject those who are abrasive, self-serving, or disrespectful of my life’s beliefs.  Every one of us gets to choose who we let in; respect yourself and make purposeful choices.

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Your Resolution Solution!!

Have you made a New Year’s Resolution?

Its been three days, how are you doing?

A lot of people aspire to lose weight, or exercise more, or eat better.  It seems like it is usually health related, either mental health or physical health.  But the thing with resolutions is: most people break them and then just give up.

If you want to be healthier, there are lots of ways to do this.  But the number one way to be healthier is to eat healthy food.  You are what you eat, and if you eat a bunch of junk, well, you get the picture.  The easiest way to eat healthier is to start at the grocery store.  If you don’t buy junk food, it has no way of getting into your house!!  When you have healthy food in your house, that’s generally what you will eat if you’re hungry. (But ALWAYS read the label on what you are buying.  If you can’t pronounce the ingredient, you probably don’t want to eat it.)

What about sleep?  Do you get at least 7 hours of sleep a night?  Do you meditate?  Do you read before bed? New science discoveries tells us not to use a light emitting device to read from before you go to sleep.  But reading a paper-paged book can help ease your mind.

Are you able to manage your stress level?  (If you do, please tell me how. )

Are you trying to be more organized?  More diligent about your financial situation?  Or do you want to stop a habit or addiction you have?  What is it that you want to do to make a better life for yourself?

We don’t need to make resolutions.  We don’t need to broadcast anything to the world.  We can make one better decision at a time, and that will be better than any resolution.   Each good decision we make brings us one step closer to the next better decision.  And once we start making better decisions every time, we truly become better people.  But if you mess up and make a bad decision, remember: don’t cry over spilled milk.  I love that old saying.  Don’t freak out and stress out  about it because there’s nothing you can do to change it.  Clean it up, and be more careful next time.  We all make mistakes, its part of being human.  But by making these better decisions, we’ll make less mistakes and we’ll be happier, healthier people all year, not just the first week of January.

Happy New Year!



Samsung 064

This is my cat Dude. He’s really lazy, but he’s happy! 🙂


Some people get stuck.  We get stuck on the past and the problems and the lies we tell ourselves about ourselves.  If you get stuck, the first thing to do is to realize that you are stuck.  You stop growing when you’re stuck.  Being stuck feels like anxiety, sadness, that feeling of I don’t like this but I don’t know what to do about it. As soon as you feel this, acknowledge it.  Say to yourself, “Self, I’m stuck.  I don’t want to remain stuck.  I love you.  I completely love myself and I accept myself and all that goes with it. But I want to move forward, and I know that you know how to get us unstuck. Please proceed.”

(What? You don’t want to talk to yourself?  Its cool, I do it all the time!)

Sometimes we only talk to ourselves by the negative things in our heads, and that is something that’s very hard to control.  Instead, make time each day to tell yourself that you are good, you are love, and that its OK that you’ve made mistakes in your past. Its OK that you burnt your breakfast and had to throw it out.  Its OK that you broke the trim on the garage door because you got to close to it when you were backing out.  Its OK that you forgot the cans of cat food on the hall table and the dog chewed them to pieces, and its OK that you put the cereal in the fridge with the milk.  Too many times we beat ourselves up over silly things.  If you find yourself talking to yourself this way again, stop and imagine what you would say if your best friend told you her story about how she had done these things.  Would you berate her for this?  Would you tell him how stupid he was for something that insignificant?

Of course you wouldn’t. So why then do we tell ourselves these things?

Its very important to love yourself, forgive yourself and take care of yourself.

Its not being selfish. Trust me on this one.  I used to not take care of myself.  I have a family and I took care of them first, always.  But then somewhere down the line my body started to tell me that I couldn’t keep this up.  I needed to take the time to take care of me.  Its not something that will happen overnight, but with practice and time, you will learn what your body needs.

Mine needs healthy wholesome foods, no junk and no processed foods, I feel terrible when I eat that stuff!  I also need to visit my chiropractor on a regular basis.  If I don’t, I don’t feel as good as I know I do when I go.  I also need exercise, I feel better when I get up and move, and I need water, not so much coffee.  I also have recently found out that I really feel better when I go for a massage on a regular basis.  (Not a light back-rub, but a deep tissue massage from an actual massage therapist.)  My muscles get really tight, really fast, and if  skip a couple massages, I really feel it.  And tight muscles are much more prone to injury.

I also take the time to read, I love learning new things and this stimulates my mind.  I also have started taking the time to write.  It feels good to take the thoughts from my mind and translate them into something that others can read, and hopefully learn from as well.  I read some fiction once in awhile too, and that helps the imagination continue to function.  “If you can imagine it, you can achieve it; and if you can dream it, you can become it.”  William Arthur Ward came up with this quote and its very true.  You are who you think you are, so make sure you think that you are an awesome person!

All in all, when I take the time to take care of myself, I don’t feel stuck.  I don’t feel lacking in anything.  Sometimes, we look at these things as nonessentials in our lives, because they do cost money and need to be budgeted for.  But if you look at the things you end up spending money on because you don’t take care of yourself, you will find that doing these things will actually save you money in the long run.  So you’ll feel better, look better, and you’ll have more money!! What could be better than that?

If something is important to you, you will find a way to do it.  And when you have a passion in your life, and things you believe in, it actually makes you a healthier person physically, mentally, and emotionally.  If someone sits around a lot, they tend to become depressed, thinking about everything that is wrong.  If instead you can focus on what’s right, you’ll feel a lot better.  Being stuck feels like the opposite of feeling better.  It feels worse.  It feels less than.  NO one wants to feel that way, and you shouldn’t have to.

What are things that make you feel better?  One study showed that people who volunteer their time to help others are happier than people who don’t. http://www.pursuit-of-happiness.org/science-of-happiness/  And other studies at Harvard University show that being a happier person can help you live longer and healthier lives!   http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/magazine/happiness-stress-heart-disease/

What’s something you can do for yourself today that will help you become a better you, and a healthier you? I’d love to hear your ideas, or what you’ve done that has made you feel better in the past.